Better get you a sport bra dude...a big one. Maybe two of them.

Source: https://old.bitchute.com/video/KStvKs3oN5dg/

Thumbnail: https://imgflip.com/i/9pomen

This story would be amusing all on its own...but this fellow is actually famous for appearing in a video - perhaps you've seen it:

https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/protect-home-thieves-39162868

https://twitter.com/barstoolsports/status/977243595655675904

Every once in a while, the internet blesses us with such a gem, such a beauty, such a captivating video that you can’t help but appreciate it. This is one of those videos. You simply will not find a more animated, more charming human being that the chubby southerner in this video. The reporter asked, “what happened?” and it was off to the races. I was trying to pick out what specific parts I would write about and I couldn’t so I transcribed the whole thing.

Guy: “See that’s what the problem was. See I heard ‘em first I said hold on….I said hold up, wait a minute. Something ain’t right because then I started to taste e’em. I was like, *smack, smack, smack, smack, smack, smack. And then I started to smell ‘em, so it was like a smell like a taste like, *smack, smack, smack, sniff, sniff, sniff’* I knew something special about it. You know?

Reporter: So what did you do when you heard the intruder?

Guy:I ran upstairs. I had to run I had to do what that little girl…what’s that hiding girl? Who dat girl uh, ? In the holocaust, she had uh, she uh Anne Hathaway…Ann Frank! That’s that hiding bitch ain’t it?! I had to get up the stairs. So he had so much rhythm when he was walking up the stairs. He *doom, doom, doom*, bitch almost started to beat box up in that closet. *A-pum-ch, a-pum-ch, a-pum-pum. A-pum-a-chi-a-pum-pum.* But I couldn’t do it. I got court tomorrow. So,

Smelling intruders, Anne Frank, beatboxing to the footsteps. Not since ‘ain’t no got time for dat’ lady have I been so engrossed in an interview. It’s like he was born for that specific moment. I don’t know what he’s going to court for but I wish him nothing but the best. It would be a real shame to see someone with that much storytelling talent waste away in jail. Here’s to hoping we see much more of this guy in the future.

https://www.barstoolsports.com/blog/959729/guy-goes-on-gma-and-gives-hands-down-the-most-electric-interview-of-all-time