"I just want to ask a question right now. If you don't have time to answer it's fine. It's about life being unfair and why It is so hard for me to except that idea. I've been an atheist for years, but I still cling to the idea that life is fair. It has caused me great pain in my adulthood. I grew up with: the slave religion that was supposed to save me and reward me after death, Disney happily ever afters, nice guy gets the girl in the end and action hero prevails and bad guy gets it in the end Hollywood. I've been through allot of anger recently and I realized that I'm driven by revenge. I don't want to really hurt anyone. I just want to throw it in their face when I'm a "success". I want to get back at the little league coach that made me sit on the bench 9 innings, I want the teachers from high school that said I wouldn't amount to anything envious of me. I want those girls that dumped me or ignored me to throw themselves at me. I didn't realize that this raging inferno in me could be stopped so I could pursue real happiness. Still, after everything, I have that core belief that life is fair. It is destroying my life. Its so deep in my heart. I've realized that I hate life. I want to be the best I can be, but the pain can be overwhelming sometimes.
What steps should I take to free myself from this belief that is pulling me down to the depths of hell?"

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