Neil deGrasse Tyson walked into a bar with a mystery person. The barman greeted them thus: “Welcome sir and ma’am, your orders, please?” Tyson barked back, “Buddy, you haven’t asked us what our pronouns are! How do you know Scarlette is a woman? You didn’t ask what Scarlette is identifying as, this evening. Nor me, for that matter; just what percentage masculine I’m feeling tonight!” “Well, PHEW!!, for Scarlette it’s pretty bloody obvious, isn’t it?” and under his breath, (“You woke libtard!”), the barman returned, adding, looking at Scarlette, “Have you borne any children?” “Who are you asking?” Tyson demanded. “Scarlette, of course,” the barman answered. “I have borne three beautiful children, thank you for asking, barman,” Scarlette radiated, lusciously.

Collecting himself, eyeballing Tyson, and recommitting to his professional standards, the barman returned “You look like you are a cocktail couple; we’ve got everything, what would you like?” “I’ll have a ‘Queens’,” Tyson replied. “I’ll have a ‘Between the Sheets’, big boy!” Scarlette winked back at the barman, slipping him her number, while Tyson was checking his eyeliner in the mirror.

That was the fourteenth in my EK’s Funny Bone series. Wonders never cease, from the supposedly well-educated. EK Lippenmeyer, Perth’s northern suburbs, Western Australia, this Thursday 28th November, 2024.