1) Hey Joe! What you doing with that mic in your hand? 

   I'm saying something stupid and confounding all the people I can. 

   Come on man. 

2) Hey Joe! What you doing to our pipes and our wells? 

   I rigged an oil embargo to ensure that our economy fails.

3) Hey Joe! What you doing as the chief in command? 

   I make the military give our weapons to the Taliban. 

4) Hey Joe! Illicit drugs cause bad addictions and they kill. 

   I'll keep the borders open so that China can sell us more Fentanyl. 

5) Hey Joe! What you doing with our money in your hands? 

   I dole out lots of favors making national inflation really bad. 

6) Hey Joe! We're terrified of CoViD. What should we do? 

   Just keep taking vaccinations, even if this is killing you. 

7) Hey Joe! What advice would you give a horny man? 

   Fake that you're a woman. In their locker-room have all the fun you can.